Ultrasound 3 was fine.  Uno is looking a bit more like a bug and less like a nebula.  Heartbeat was 158.  I’m told the range is “120-190” at this stage which I thought was laughably wide but hey, we’re in it, so I’m OK with that.  The suspense is leaking out of these ultrasound days, but only a little.  My next visit is next Friday, more than a week, at which time I’ll be ultrasounded again and see the doc for the last time.  It would all be happening so fast if it weren’t for the nausea.

When I told the nurse-practitioner the nausea was bad, she asked me if I wanted Zofran and gave me a prescription.  I feel I may be letting down the side if I take it, yet it was a tremendous relief to know I can.  I feel conflicted to say the least.  I can understand the obvious Thalidomide associations with a pregnancy anti-nausea drug, but then again, no drug has probably been more closely examined for that same reason.  But there is also this idea that pregnancy = suffering and that I should suck it up for the good of the baby.  Motherhood won’t be easy, so why wimp out now? 

Or, maybe, motherhood won’t be easy, so why not get a break when I can?

It’s very appealing to think that since some things like hair dye and non-organic foods aren’t proved absolutely safe, that my baby will be healthier if I avoid them.  But is avoiding an unknown or possibly imaginary harm going to guarantee a healthy baby?  I think not.  I think avoiding any harms I can is fine, but I know me: I’m going to be tempted into thinking that by avoiding pesticide residue on my strawberries I am guaranteeing no health problems in my child.

That’s kind of a stretch.  I’d love to guarantee that but I can’t.  Further, I have a feeling that the inevitable “imperfections” or health problems that my child will bring into this world are part of his or her physical destiny, and not the result of some hydrogenated oil or a manicure.  It’s scary but I feel it’s healthiest for us to believe we’ll have the kids we’re supposed to have, warts and all. 

My husband and I have been debating the evolutionary purpose of morning sickness.  Does nausea guide me to the right foods for my baby?  From what I hear, nausea guides women to flat Coke and white bread or not much of anything.  My mother swears all she ate were hot dogs from Dairy Queen.  It’s hard to see what good purpose the nausea serves.  Maybe it’s just to deter women from having too many babies.  Maybe it’s that “in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children” thing and doesn’t have an evolutionary purpose.

Check it out, I just quoted the Bible while musing on evolution.  I’m a Renaissance woman.

For now the prescription is in my purse.  Your thoughts?