I’m into the second phase of my cycle, which is the part I always think I’m going to like but then I don’t.  The first phase is Lupron which = depression.  The second phase is estrogen which = pain.  Today is the first day I have not cried (yet, it’s almost 7 pm) from the deep pelvic pain of my estrogenated endometrial WHAT THE HELL IS IN THERE ANYWAY tissue; it is apparently strangling my colon.  While this sucks, I am not depressed and that is good.  It’s also good that the cumulative effect of cycling seems to have shrunk the endo.  Or maybe it was my last, brief bout of pregnancy that did it.  As if I don’t already have pregnancy on a pedestal, it also waves some autoimmune-related magic wand and the endo pain literally vanishes.    

Anyway, waaah, I know; nobody is making me do this so I shouldn’t complain.  Once I get the hang of basically 24-7 use of pain relievers I can handle it, and once I start with the progesterone it gets better.  Ahhh yes, the third phase is progesterone which = mellow.  Progesterone for me is the chills-you-ever-so-slightly hormone, it helps me sleep and balances out the jangly estrogen feeling I’ve got going now.  Progesterone is part of why my two week waits go pretty well, and the estrogen is probably why I get wiggy during egg retrieval time.  This time the eggs are embryos sleeping peacefully in the freezer, so there is nothing to wig about. 

And not much else going on. 

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